by rossanahead | Mar 16, 2011 | grandparenting, Jing Lejano, parenting, woman
By Jing Lejano
At 43, I never thought that I’ll be singing ABCs, reciting 123s, and wondering what all those twinkling stars are doing tonight. But here I am doing nursery whatnots 13 years after my youngest son was born.
I was already on teen mode.
I am way past the sleep-deprived mommy phase of the baby years when you can’t get four straight hours of sleep because your little one is hungry—again. Today, my kids would eat just about anything. And fortunately for me, they know their way around the kitchen. No need for mommy to get up early in the morning to make breakfast.
I am past all the angst and agony of separation anxiety when your preschooler grabs your knee every time you step out the door. Today, my kids are all too happy when I have to go out of town. If I’m gone for just two days in fact, they’d even ask, “Back so soon?” Those rascals!
I am past the stage where I worry about meeting development milestones, height averages, and weight standards. Today, my kids are healthy and strong. And my boys are all taller than me—which doesn’t mean I can’t raise my voice and stand my ground when they don’t come home on time or they don’t wash the dishes when it’s their turn.
And so, when I became a grandmother at 41, I had this very scary nightmare that I’d have to go through all those things again. I actually lost sleep thinking I might not get enough sleep—again.
I needn’t have worried. My daughter is a good mother, and she’s an even better daughter because she didn’t ask her mother to do the mothering for her.
What I like best about being a Lula at 43 is that I get to do the fun part of mothering. Sophie and I eat ice cream, sing with Barney, and dance to Sheryl Crow. In the mornings, she greets me with a big fat kiss. In the afternoons, we cuddle up on the couch, watching Mickey Mouse. In the evenings, we play ball under the moonlight. I have so many other things that I want to do with her, so many things I want to teach her. I can’t wait!
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
by | Mar 12, 2011 | Education, parenting, Ruth M. Floresca, woman
By Ruth Manimtim-Floresca
All of us go through a lot of firsts in our lives. I remember being patiently taught by my grandmother how to iron my school uniforms when I started my freshman year in high school. It took a few weeks before I got the task down pat but, finally, I did! And from then on, I would iron all my uniforms on Sunday nights and fold them neatly in my large bag the next day before I leave for my boarding house in Los Banos where I stay during weekdays.
When our kids were old enough to do chores, my husband and I also painstakingly instructed and demonstrated to them how to do things so they could help around the house. In the process, we’ve had days when the rice was either soggy or crunchy; red hotdogs have turned black; the pot of boiled eggs had emitted clouds of smoke because the water had dried up while the flames underneath continued their merry dance; an expensive pair of pants was burned by a too-hot iron; plates and glasses flew from soapy hands to land as tiny pieces on the floor; and many other disasters.
Sometimes, our patience would be stretched to its limits but we knew we can’t give up helping the boys “get it right.” How else could they learn if they are not allowed to make mistakes?
Nowadays, whenever I’m up to my neck in deadlines, I could continue working on my laptop or leave the house to attend a media event while a teen or pre-teen would take over washing the dishes, sweeping the yard, feeding the dog or, even, cooking menudo!
For us, having no maid to rely on for years now is more of an advantage than a setback. We’re grateful for the opportunity to watch and wait for our kids to grow up as responsible human beings who don’t expect other people to do what they could already accomplish on their own. We also often remind the boys that we need to help each other out because, really, that’s what being family is all about.
Photo by Allen Taylor on Unsplash
by | Mar 11, 2011 | career, Karen Galarpe, parenting, woman
By Karen Galarpe
For the nth time, I ate at my desk at work today. Some days are hectic, some aren’t, and today is just one of the hectic ones at the newsroom.
In between writing and editing news about OFWs arriving from Libya, Fil-Ams observing Lent in America, and a 5-star chef whipping up gourmet dishes in Baguio City, I would grab a bite of my rice meal picked up from the food court, and think about what to write in this blog.
Sometimes I feel I am doing so many things—multitasking—but I just cannot NOT multitask. I am a mother after all, and a daughter, and a sister, and a working journalist, and a friend too.
And so I try to do what I can on most days, armed with a little prayer to God up there, and with a smile to greet the people around me. Better to brighten up the world, right? There are just so many weird and bad things happening in the world around us.
If you’re a mom, you’d know what I’m talking about—multitasking—and probably can recall having to make a grocery shopping list while waiting for a meeting to start, or dropping by a bookstore on the way home from work to buy a cartolina or some oslo paper your child absolutely needs the next day.
Some days you field a call from the office while stirring that spaghetti sauce in the kitchen at home. At other times, you just drop everything and care for your child who is nursing a high-grade fever.
Motherhood—it’s tough, and more so if you’re a working mom at that. But no other calling is closest to my heart than being a mom to my son, now a teenager.
Along the way, I’ve learned many things about mothers, kids, teaching, learning, bonding, living life, celebrating each moment. I won’t pretend to know it all, but will share here what I know works. After all, we’re all in this—motherhood—together.
So smile, mom, no matter how busy you are.
by | Mar 9, 2011 | Education, parenting, woman
By Bubbles Salvador
The day I first brought home my baby boy from the hospital felt like the first day of classes.
When I was still single, I helped my sister, who is a single mom, raise all three of her kids. But I had no idea what to do with the baby whom I had willingly and lovingly brought into this world. What if he cried all night? What if he got hungry and I couldn’t breastfeed?
Fast forward to two years later: I am still no expert, and there are days that feel like it’s the first day of classes all over again. I have only been a mom for all of two years, but I know that raising a child is no easy feat. (Hats off to those who’ve been moms for longer.) I grapple with issues like discipline and TV time and toilet training and lola’s spoiling. Did I mention that I still have no idea if I’m doing it right?
The thing about being a parent is that there doesn’t seem to be any right or wrong answer to anything. Yes, you can rely on what books and experts say, but what seems to work perfectly for one mom may not work for me and my son. I think that’s when it starts to feel like the first day of school – I am constantly running to “beat the bell,” looking for the “right classroom,” and trying to “belong.”
But oh, I tell you, my life has never been this exciting. Every day I am amazed at how Luis is growing and learning things. (Of late, it is his ability to string words together to form a sentence that makes me go “Awww.”) Being in first-day-of-school mode can be scary, but I like it because the excitement doesn’t ever wear out.
I can’t wait for more amazing experiences to come.
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash
by rossanahead | Mar 8, 2011 | children, family, parenting, Ruth M. Floresca, woman
My name is Ruth Manimtim-Floresca, a work-at-home mom who contributes articles to Philippine print and online publications. I feel blessed that I am able to earn from what I enjoy doing and which come with flexible work hours. This allows me to spend more time with my family and primarily care for my son with special needs.
I have four boys aged 12, 13, 15, and 17. Daniel, my youngest, is in fifth grade; Joshua, my second son, is a high school junior; and Geffrey, our firstborn is a college freshman taking up Digital Media Arts. James, my third child, has spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy. He can’t talk or walk but he has already taught our family so much about love, patience, and faith for the past 13 years, and counting.
Although our household can be noisy at times, they are mostly happy sounds. Sure, the three boys argue over computer schedules and who’s going to wash the dishes or feed the dog every now and then. But when we ask them to take care of their brother while their dad and I go out to do errands, buy groceries, or attend meetings and media events, they can be trusted to do that job well.
We have been maid- and yaya-free for the past three years and we’re doing fine. Honestly, I feel more confident now when leaving the house with only the kids there than having someone else look after them. I believe our circumstances have taught my boys to be more resilient and independent. Like their dad, whom I so appreciate for being hands-on, I hope our kids would also become thoughtful husbands someday who won’t expect their wives to do everything around the house.
I may feel overwhelmed and utterly exhausted with house chores and writing deadlines most of the time, but I wouldn’t trade places with anyone else. I am grateful for where, and who, I am now.–Ruth Manimtim-Floresca
Photo by Joshua Harris on Unsplash
